Sunday, January 9, 2011

Holding on to my Comfort Zone


As a Taurean, I’m a pretty rigid individual. I strive for stability and I abhor change. I work well under pressure but I hate being rushed. If change is a must, you have to give me time to warm up to it and even so, I might fight against it. I do not do things without thinking it over.
I’d like to think that after 26 years I have matured in some way. If things do not go the way I want them to, I’ve learned acceptance (after stewing about it for a day or two). I no longer expect the world to give in to my EVERY whim (although I still expect to get MOST of my wishes). And the most difficult of all, I’ve subjected myself to change and go out of my comfort zone – provided of course, I’m given time, lots and lots of it.
However, yesterday my “maturity” was put to the test and I failed. I was caught by surprise, way out of my comfort zone and I bolted. Funny, your mom always does that to me. I don’t know her that much and we barely met. For all I know she might be really nice and dandy but she terrifies the hell out of me. Yesterday’s disappearing act was a testimony of my fear. I barely saw her outside the airport door but I jumped and ran as fast as I can carry my luggage and never looked back. As I said, I don’t like being pushed out of my comfort zone, yesterday I was shoved and slammed and I panicked. After some deep contemplation (about 30 min of taxi ride back to the apartment), and no thanks to my roommate’s non-stop laughter, I realized how hilarious I looked and I’m deeply embarrassed.  I am sorry and all, but really, would it be terrible of me to ask NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER, to go through that again?